This Shit is Getting Real

margsLast night, I concluded what I call the “Farewell Tour of Jen 1.0”:  dinner with good friends in Denver at a yummy new restaurant called the Matador in The Highlands.  As we received our first round of margaritas, it was within minutes mine was empty and everyone else’s were 80% full.  “Damn, that went down fast!” I hear.  A bit embarrassed, I joked I usually chug my first drink and then significantly slow down thereafter (that is true).  What hit me driving on the way home is that I am way more stressed out about my upcoming surgery than I am showing to the world.  A little less than 2 weeks, my life will change forever…for the better.  While I am scared about the physical limitations that I will have for months (i.e. putting on socks unassisted will be a big goal) I look forward to the day that I can walk pain-free.

Just before I got home, I heard a new song with a catchy tune on the radio, but as I listened to the words, I just had to laugh: there is no turning back, there never was an option on turning back:

“Afraid to lose control
And caught up in this world
I’ve wasted time, I’ve wasted breath
I think I’ve thought myself to death

I was born without this fear
Now only this seems clear
I need to move, I need to fight
I need to lose myself tonight…”

– Johnny Kongos, Come With Me Now

 

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